Fraulines Hot and Sexy: Eric Amaranth

Home » Post Category Eric Amaranth

Showing posts with label Eric Amaranth. Show all posts

Traveling with Sex Toys this Holiday Season?

Have you ever traveled with your sex toys and carried them aboard an airplane? With tightened airport security, more and more people are getting pulled out of line and searched. But should this restrict your vacation of sexual adventures? Eric Amaranth, sex coach extraordinaire, believes in adding novelty in your bedroom or hotel room. Eric is here with a humorous tale about his travel misadventures with his sex toys!

* * *

My girlfriend and I went to a wedding this past weekend and decided to bring four of our favorite sex toys with us. Two were vibrators shaped innocuously, one was a dildo with an obvious phallic shape, and the fourth was a glass design that defies brief description. Which is why it’s pictured at right. Read on for the humor and adventure.

We left from Newark International Airport, then made our way through security manned and womaned, as always, by the intrepid TSA officers. All the toys were packed in my luggage. The officer at the viewing screen stopped the line and brought other officers over to get their opinions. I watched with a straight face while my girlfriend giggled quietly after having made it through their scrutiny. Suddenly the principle viewing agent said words to the effect of, “I don’t believe this. Bag check!”

I smiled inside, but kept a disinterested look on my face. They asked me whose bag it was and I raised my hand. They first ran the diagnostic wipes over the handles and inside surfaces, then fed them into a machine. Nothing went off. Next step was the visual exam.

The male officer rifled through my clothes. The toys were at the bottom of the suitcase. He stopped and stared for half a second, then put my things back on top and gestured with his thumb that I could be on my way. My girlfriend was laughing harder by the time I joined her, but quietly. Oh yes, the officer had gloves on throughout the check.

The second run-in was in the return at a southern city’s small airport. Once again, I took the toys in my bag. Said bag went through the x-ray machine and again, the line was stopped. A middle aged woman with vintage spectacles peered at the screen for much a few seconds, I’d estimate four. She didn’t call for viewing assistance, but did request a bag check and said out loud to the officer snapping on nitrile gloves, “It looks like an art piece!”

My girlfriend had once again already made it through and I looked over at her with her hand on her mouth covering up the giggles. The TSA guy ID’ed me as the owner of the bag and did the wipe down, as before, then asked me where the object was that they were concerned about.

I figured it was the glass toy, because the other three would not lend themselves to an art piece characterization. The phallus… the most obvious attention-grabber, never entered the discussion. The agent brought out the figure as seen above, reached over for a collection pan that you’d put jewelry and loose change in, then walked off with my art piece. They asked me what it was. I said art piece, which is technically true.

I heard my girlfriend choking back her guffaws. She’d lost it. I kept my poker face on and waited. They brought it back after a minute, I took it, and they said I was free to travel. Put it back in, got my things, put my belt and shoes back on, and joined my girlfriend.

She laughed about that for the next three minutes. I smiled big and wondered why they were afraid of my toy and realized the spiral going up the “shaft” may have looked like a wire. Anyway, the moral of the story is to keep a straight face, know you have a right to your hot sex toys in your bag, and enjoy the trip because many people’s best sex is on vacations due to the privacy and change of scenery.

Cross posted with permission from Eric Amaranth's blog here.

Eric Amaranth is a sex life coach, working in NYC and globally via video conference, who specializes in women’s and men’s sexuality, basic to advanced sex skills, and high-end sex education. Individuals and couples are guided toward the relationship, intimacy, and sexual enjoyment goals they desire most.

Amaranth believes that for the majority of people, appreciation of ourselves and our romantic partners is one of the best sustainable resources we have to continuously renew attraction, maintain respect, and stay in love with our partners. This bedrock of deep appreciation is founded and reinforced by the combination of loving relationship skills with breathtaking sexual skills. Follow him on Twitter @Eric_Amaranth.

You have read this article Eric Amaranth / funny / sex toys / story with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/12/traveling-with-sex-toys-this-holiday.html. Thanks!

What Is Sexually 'Normal', Anyway?

Though the Kinsey Institute has multiple points around sexual averages of the American population at large, there are few places to find out about normality. Sometimes all we need is to hear we're normal. That everything is alright; having sex 3 times a week is a great amount of sex! That being dominated can be fun. But what about your normal? What is your normal and how do you make it better?

At GetLusty for Couples, we're all about ending boring sex. Because sometimes boring sex can become normal. So let's talk about that. What is normal? Do you want normal, anyway? Or do you want extraordinary? Amazing? Eric Amaranth is here to talk about normal. What is it and why it might not matter as much as we think.

* * *

Define "normal"

Sex therapists, educators, and sex life coaches alike all get this question on a weekly basis. People have things in their sex lives that are hot for them, have desires to do things, look at how much sex they’re having and for how long etc. They wonder if where they are or what they’re doing is favorable compared to their neighbors’ sex lives or the collective in general. Sometimes the question pertains to physical characteristics. Anatomy questions aside, I answer: “We first have to define 'normal' and establish for one’s self a decision to have an extraordinary level of satisfaction with one’s sex life.”

Firstly, part of where people’s assumptions are derived is from how your doctor uses the word, “normal.” In this case, it denotes the lack of pathology/illness and proper function of some part of your body or mind. Abnormal. That’s something you hear in test results. We know what that means. Sometimes, but only in a minority of those times, you can use the terms normal and abnormal to categorize a sexual issue. Necrophilia, for example. Yes, definitely mentally abnormal in that doctor’s test sort of serious way. A penis with two heads. Not normal. However, I find in the majority of people’s sex lives, normal and abnormal take on opposite meanings.

One thing that’s very interesting is how often I found myself using the word “normal” during my sessions in reference to my clients’ questions, issues, and goals. A boring sex life? That’s normal. A guy who wants to get into someone’s pants for his pleasure alone and speedy release? Normal. Women who care more about what other women think about their bodies than how sexy their romantic partners think they are — normal. Women faking orgasms and for the same reasons every other woman does: normal. Men that expect great sexual feats from their wives or girlfriends when he’s not willing to reciprocate with learning what to do for her. Yeah, that’s normal.

I call them normal because the issues are so widespread in a great many people’s sex lives everywhere. In other words, to be expected. I can’t call something like a consistently and strongly orgasmic woman abnormal. I can’t call a couple who grow closer through their sex life together not normal. It’s obviously too negative. I call examples like these extraordinary. Everyone loves that word. Most of us want extraordinary things in our lives, but often those wonderful things are also technically not normal. Every time I tell this to clients it brightens their outlook and changes how they use the word “normal” instantly. Another viewpoint, I saw a graphic once that said: “Normal is a cycle on your dishwasher.”

"Normal" varies from person to person

Comparing your sex life to other people’s doesn’t propel a person forward. Crafting your sex life to your taste and customized design does. Start asking instead, “Am I extraordinary?” Then imagine what the extraordinary would be like for you. What would it look like, sound like, feel like? This is the very first step and some of the best free advice I can give to anyone who wants to improve her or his sex life.

Originally posted on Eric Amaranth's blog.

Eric Amaranth is a sex life coach who specializes in women’s and men’s sexuality, basic to advanced sex skills, and high-end sex education. Check out his website, Sex Life Coach NYC. Eric is not a psychology-based “sex therapist,” which is the term that the public uses to refer to every professional in his field, regardless of training background. After graduating from The College of William and Mary, he went on to become the ten-year protege of pioneering sex coach Betty Dodson, PhD.

Eric’s sex life coaching is made for adults. He has knowledge and methodology differences that set him apart from what psychology-based sex therapists have to offer. Eric works with clients from all over the world toward his ambitious goal that his brand of sex life coaching would one day significantly reduce the instances of divorce. Eric lives in New York City, in Manhattan, with his much-loved girlfriend. Find him on Twitter @Eric_Amaranth and subscribe to him on Facebook.

You have read this article better sex / Communication / Eric Amaranth / health / marriage / stronger relationship with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/12/what-is-sexually-anyway.html. Thanks!

Why Monogamy is Really Sexy

We've had a lot of articles on polyamory lately. We started off with polyamory in the deep end. First, we addressed Technogeisha's story of polyswinging. We asked, "Is my relationship ready for polyamory?". Finally, we helped define, "What is polyamory, anyway?" a mini guide for the polyamory newbie.

Pepper Mint of FreakSexual even podcasted with our Erica Grigg about polyamory & how mongomous couples can learn from polyamorists. With so much polyamory talk going on, we thought we needed to give more love to monogamy! We believe in the power of monogamy. Traditional relationships between two people are one's that fit us best. But maybe that's just because we're so busy we just don't have time to start dating again. In either case, Eric Amaranth is back to discuss the advantages that come with being in a monogamous relationship.

* * *

True, you only get to have sex with one person

Everyone knows the weaknesses of monogamy: same partner, no other partners to experience sex with, the loss of enjoying the unique little strengths that given lovers will have in bed for you or when you do things to them. However, it’s very helpful to be aware of monogamy’s strengths. Ones that are under-utilized by most.

But then again, you get to have sex with one person!

The first strength is housed within what most consider to be its biggest shortfall: you only get to have sex with one person.

The biggest disadvantage to having multiple partners is you only see them when your schedule permits. Every time you have hot sex, you often go to your routine sex methods. Due to the separation you feel while apart, when you two get together you go to the 'favorite tracks,' so to speak. Discovering new sexy things is always possible. However, if you want to do something with them that’s more advanced and requires practice and time, working on that doesn’t get done because of the aforementioned conditions. It is harder to grow and develop your sex life together.

Enjoy your shared life together; just you two

The opposite is true for monogamous couples. Especially the ones that live together: because you’re together all the time and have much more sexual access to one another. This is where the brain will start to whine for novelty a bit louder. A good answer to that pang comes in the form of spending more time practicing sex together. Practicing to improve your sexual skills and your communication will give you unique sexual experiences and the orgasms to go with them.

Every sex session you have with your partner doesn’t have to be “flow sex,” as it has been called. With more time together you can choose to have “training sex,” sessions that are fun and hot in a different kind of way. Hot, often at the precise moment when it goes from experimentation, to the experience working and feeling and/or looking and sounding incredible.

In time, you can develop a sexy anticipation of that 'eureka' moment due to having a more sophisticated approach to a shared sex life. Because that’s what monogamy is. A shared life. The decisions the two of you make about your sex life profoundly affect the other because there is no leaving to go to someone else. The concept of two becoming one in marriage proceedings is quite accurate in this case, so be aware of this when making decisions together about your one sex life together.

Great sex and affectionate touch is the best vacation you ever had condensed down into anywhere from less than five minutes to hours or whole weekends long. Having access to that in one’s life is a huge reason to keep on keeping on and leave behind the feeling that all you have to live for is your career, perhaps parenting, or other necessaries.

Check out the original post at Sex Life Coach NYC.

You have read this article advice / Eric Amaranth / for couples / monogamy / relationships with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/11/why-monogamy-is-really-sexy.html. Thanks!

4 Workout Tips for Better Sex & Orgasms

Having a healthy body (as defined by ourselves, not others) is mind-blowingly hot. What's not to love about feeling good with yourself, inside and out? Count on being more emotionally and physically fit, not to mention being better in bed! Being healthy is one of the biggest actions to promote self love you can do. Our resident Sex Life Coach Eric Amaranth talks about getting healthy for better sex. What could be better?

* * *

It is absolutely true that a sex life can be enjoyed regardless of the shape someone is in. My sex life coaching works for a wide range of body types. It is also true that people in better shape have certain advantages in the bedroom. This blog post will cover several of the most relevant muscle groups for both women and men plus the effect they have on your sex and orgasm quality and possibilities.

#1 Abs

This muscle group is one of the most important for men (or women on top). The abs are called on most to drive the pelvis during missionary and sideways missionary intercourse, which is still quite popular. Speeding up the rhythm of his thrust multiplies the effort required to keep up that pace.

Slow is also great, can contribute perfectly to big orgasms, and fast can make it feel like a blur of friction that isn’t as good as the details you can feel with slow. That said, fast has its place and specific advantages too. There are times when certain types of penetration must be done at a rapid rate based on the needs of his partner’s body/genitals to reach orgasm or have the best time possible. There still other situations that have nothing to do with the receiving partner’s needs and everything to do with the man expressing his overpowering desire for his partner and masculine sexual intention.

Abs also play a lesser role in many other positions because they will be recruited for most forms of thrusting. This is why I put abs workouts at the top of the list. The more crunches you can do, the more endurance you’ll have, which translates into being able to thrust rapidly for a longer period of time, which is exactly what your partner may need for a favorite type of big orgasm. Triggering certain orgasms in a given person can also require specific forms of energy-intensive stimulation. If you have what it takes to trigger it, great! If not, then that’s okay, but it’s time to get back in the gym.

My favorite way to workout my abs is with a abs machine that allows me to increase the weight over time in a precise way. After you do crunches to a certain point, curling your own body weight wont be enough for further gains. Crunches on the floor are hard on your tail bone and low back. You also wont be able to add more weight resistance to your crunches in a way that is easy to manage for the majority of people. I’ve seen my most consistent gains in my abs since using a crunches machine.

#2 Quads/thighs

This muscle group is equally important to abs for both women and men. Strong, developed thighs allow a woman to sit astride her man (or penetrating woman) and buck and grind for as long as she wants or needs to drive him or her or herself over the edge into a big-O. This is a popular position for indirect clitoral stimulation during intercourse which works nicely for those women with a clitoris sensitive enough to build up and orgasm from vaginal penetration plus indirect clitoral stimulation against her partner’s pelvis.

Even if a woman is not sensitive enough she can still use this position and combine other forms of direct clitoral stimulation with it. I have a personal attraction to women with developed thighs. I call these thighs “sex engines” because, besides looking sexy, driving a woman’s thrusts during female superior/cowgirl is one thing they’re made for. This position when done a certain way provides a unique form of stimulation to the head of the penis via her cervix.

Thighs are also important in other positions for men as well. Particularly positions with men and doing the thrusting on their knees. The usual weight training for thighs are good: squats and quad-targeting machines. On any of my weight training workouts, I follow a pattern of 10 reps at such and such weight, rest one minute, 8 at a bit higher weight, rest one minute, then a weight setting where I can do 4 to 6 reps before my muscles can lift no more. Rest for two minutes, then do 4 to 6 again. I repeat two more times and then I’m finished with that muscle group.

#3 Butt

The glutes are a big deal in sex. Practically and visually. For both genders, it’s simple: everyone loves to view and touch a partner’s toned, attractive bum. On a practical note, the glutes do join with the abs to help give locomotion to thrusting and other hip movements. This is an opportune time to mention that one of the things I learned early on was that rocking hips are not just a male form of physical sexual expression. I found that women also rock hips often as their body’s way of expressing the enjoyment of the sensations. I was taught that hip bobbing in women is often good to build arousal because it is sexual body language and will urge the mind to go into a more deeply aroused place. I suggest to women clients, as does my mentor, to experiment with different levels of hip bobbing and thrusting to see how it affects them and makes things better.

I’ve tried a number of different exercises that do work the glutes, but no exercise does it for me like a glutes machine. Not even squats. Squats can’t isolate the glutes like that machine can. I don’t see them in every gym, but look around in yours and try it out for a month or two using the workout method I described above. Because glutes are a large muscle group, you’ll see noticeable changes faster than in smaller muscle groups like the arms. Speaking of which….

#4 Arms

We all know women who love men love a pair of muscled arms. It reminds me of what men lust for in breast size and shape. The visual appeal is obvious and also the strength they can exert during sex is exciting. Specifically along these lines is going back to endurance again. The stronger the arms, the more endurance they have to do manual sexual skill sets (using your hands and things held by your hands) that require higher energy output for a given partner whose sex organs need more speed and power to best facilitate specific types of intense orgasms. Not running out of juice right as she’s rising up to climax was a good reason for me to get into curls and tricep work.

I like doing standing dumbell curls for my biceps and standing cable pulldowns for my triceps. Done with the same format as above. My decision to target first the specific muscle groups that serve me best in sex turned out to be a very good idea. Two more things:

1. Google workouts to increase breast size. You won’t increase the breast tissue volume, but a bit more prominence of the pecs will improve the overall look.

2. I prefer sprints and resting for a minute or two on the treadmill to long-distance running for cardiovascular exercise. That said, throwing some cardio in there is really good for stamina during intercourse.

Check out the original post at Sex Life Coach NYC.

You have read this article advice / better sex / Communication / emotional / Eric Amaranth / for couples / for men / for women / fun / health / heart health / intimacy / self love / stronger relationship with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/11/4-workout-tips-for-better-sex-orgasms.html. Thanks!

Ladies! 4 Tips on How to Get Him to Initiate Sex

Ladies, are you initiating the sex in your relationship more often than not? Does it seem like your partner never gets things started? Sex life coach Eric Amaranth is here with both why that is and solutions for your lover to get things moving!

* * *

As a sex life coach, I hear a particular question fairly often: “How do I get him to initiate sex more often? I feel like I’m always the one who gets things started.” Some of the reasons why he may be doing this can combine together to make him even less likely to charge forward. These four tips are by no means a complete solution, but they are very solid things I tell my clients.

#1 One of the most common reasons why men, young and older, slow down their initiation of sex is because of their affectionate love for their women partners. Affectionate sweetness is absolutely necessary in a relationship.

However, the more a man feels that toward his girlfriend or wife, the less likely he is to be in the mindset of “taking her,” which is more about erotic desire satisfaction than soul mate feelings (though soul mate feelings and erotic desire can be combined). Especially if his partner is a mother as well, which is to many, an asexual role. (Inside tip: Don’t start calling your partner mommy or daddy even though the kids do.)

The first and most important step to fix this is awareness of it, combined with understanding that relationships are best when they have both erotic actions and affectionate actions. Next, I suggest spending a little time daydreaming about the sexiest parts of her body or how beautiful her pretty face looks when it’s in a sexual mode. Fantasize about what you want to do to her and feel from her. Look forward to the next time when you may have a moment to share in some hotness. Monogamous couples have to be more aware and practiced with retaining hot viewpoints of their partners. What makes that a bit more challenging leads us into point two:

#2 The law of diminishing returns. Also known as the brain’s love and favor of novelty in everything be it music, food, or sex. This is why it’s important to continue to actively build and care about your sex life the same way you do your financial/business life. Finance gets more focused attention by default because it’s what pays the bills. While it’s true that good sex doesn’t fit into the survival-in-the-world category, it definitely fits into the survival-of-your-relationship category. It also fits into the pursuit of happiness category, because, as we all know, there is more to life than survival.

What that means for you is when you are actively brainstorming on and practicing brand new, hot, and intimate sex ideas, or spicy variations on what works in the present, it sparks mental interest to start experimenting with those things or keep going with perfecting them. When that’s in place, initiating springs forth naturally and more frequently. In women too!

#3 A dynamic can emerge where the woman holds the keys to the bedroom: “I’m not in the mood.” – “I’m too tired.” – “F**k me now!” – “Don’t you want me?” etc. There are many reasons for this dynamic, which is a whole other article. The man recognizes this pattern and, in polite or begrudged deference to her, moves into a place where he waits for her to say the word. Sometimes unconsciously. Then she wonders what happened.

There is deeper detail to solving this dynamic for every given couple of course, but one thing I can suggest to try is when he initiates, even if you aren’t in the mood in the moment, start with long deep kissing. Tell him to kiss you slowly. It’s been shown that deep, slow kissing is a consistent way to get a woman in the mood. Combine that kissing as things warm up with hands caressing where they will. Make out with him. If his make out skills are good, you’ll get in the mood. Another great way to get in the mood is an oiled back, shoulders, and bum massage for her. That leads me to my last suggestion:

#4 When the two of you establish successful ways she or he loves to be seduced, so to speak, return to those methods when it’s time to initiate and do so confidently. For example, if she loves an oiled massage, walk up behind her and tell her slowly and distinctly that you want to feel her hot oiled [insert sexy bod part here]. Then you want to… etc etc. When you mention something sexual you want, that is also something she loves to have done to her, it’s a much more consistent path to her rapt interest.

Men can make the logical mistake of what has been called the, “Am I gonna get lucky tonight?” approach. It fails because it is based in a self-centered perspective of how sex will benefit him and him alone. It’s logical because he knows how good it’s going to feel to his penis. (Remember, the only one that has to orgasm to make babies is the male, so his path to that is much more efficient.) Men who still do this must take on a seduction style that reflects his and her desires and hot spots. This makes initiating even more commonplace because the answer is almost always yes and the resulting sex is amazing for both. As his sexual sophistication grows, he’ll brainstorm up new seduction/initiation methods, which keeps things varied and exciting

Check out the original post at Sex Life Coach NYC.

Have a spare 5 minutes? Help end boring sex and enter to win a Sqweel 2 (the world's best selling oral sex toy) at the same time! Take our quick survey by October 15th.

You have read this article advice / better sex / Communication / emotional / Eric Amaranth / for couples / for men / for women / foreplay / intimacy / love / sex / stronger relationship with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/11/ladies-4-tips-on-how-to-get-him-to.html. Thanks!

Podcast! Eric Amaranth on Keeping Monogamy Steamy

Eric Amaranth took an unusual approach to his training as a sex coach by apprenticing under the legendary Betty Dodson for ten years instead of going to graduate school, but he wouldn't change a thing about it.

Now with his own practice, Eric uses his unique form of therapy to help clients with intimacy and adding novelty to the bedroom. We chatted with him and recorded his insights for your listening pleasure.

More on what we talked about:

What got Eric into sex coaching? He noticed a need for people who could professionally teach how to create pleasure rather than simply treating sexual abuse or dysfunction.
He apprenticed under Betty Dodson for ten years, forming a long-running professional, emotional, and physical relationship with his mentor.
Although he and Betty were non-monogamous, there are disadvantages to adapting that lifestyle, Eric says; jealousy, especially when your partner's other lovers have a skill or advantage that you don't possess, can be one of the biggest challenges.
A big challenge for monogamous couples? Adding novelty and variety to your relationship. Try new things, add them to your repertoire, and practice, practice, practice! Sex can lose its excitement even if you're awesome in bed, he says.
Waiting for someone to come along to help you recreate an explosive first time experience? Don't hold your breath, Eric says. Don't get overly attached to an isolated moment because it pressures your partner to recreate an event that may not be possible the second time around.
What does Eric recommend add novelty to a long-term relationship? Turn off the TV! Even if it's just for 10-15 minutes, re-orient your priorities and you may be surprised how much time is left over for intimacy.
Want sex to be spontaneous? Even when sex is planned, add anticipation by sending sexy texts to your significant other throughout the day to help build up to the big event.

More about Eric:

Eric Amaranth is a sex life coach who specializes in women’s and men’s sexuality, basic to advanced sex skills, and high-end sex education. Eric is not a psychology-based “sex therapist,” which is the term that the public uses to refer to every professional in his field, regardless of training background. After graduating from The College of William and Mary, he went on to become the ten-year protege of pioneering sex coach Betty Dodson, PhD.

Eric’s sex life coaching is made for adults. He has knowledge and methodology differences that set him apart from what psychology-based sex therapists have to offer. Individuals and couples are guided toward the sexual relationship, intimacy, and connection goals they desire most. Upon request, he also coaches his clients on the holistic wellness and sexual health and STD information he has successfully integrated into his own life.

Amaranth believes that for the majority of people, appreciation of ourselves and our romantic partners is one of the best sustainable resources we have to continuously renew attraction, maintain respect, and stay in love with our partners. This bedrock of deep appreciation is founded and reinforced by affectionate touch and breathtaking sexual capability. It’s what keeps partners close through the hard times. It makes partners and spouses into lovers, not distant roommates. It gives you hot sex as well as loving sex. It builds sexual desire and makes us feel alive and happy. This feeling is a crucial oasis. It lowers stress and improves our professional, marital and parenting lives. It also contributes to physical, mental, and emotional health and happiness.

Eric sees consistent success in his coaching practice with eliminating two things: clients’ infidelity interests or activities and considerations of breakup or divorce based on sexual problems and imbalances. Eric works with clients from all over the world toward his ambitious goal that his brand of sex life coaching would one day significantly reduce the instances of divorce. That’s the big picture that Amaranth wants to paint for people today and tomorrow.

Eric lives in New York City, in Manhattan, with his much-loved girlfriend. Connect with Eric on his website, www.sexlifecoachnyc.com, or find him on Facebook and Twitter @Eric_Amaranth.

You have read this article advice / better sex / Eric Amaranth / interview / intimacy / monogamy / polyamory / relationships / sex advice / stronger relationship with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/10/podcast-eric-amaranth-on-keeping.html. Thanks!

Which Is More Important: Sex or Romance?

Pretty soon, we're going to be reviewing the Five Love Languages. It's a wonderful book. In it, Gary Chapman explains that individuals express their love in five distinction languages. Two of these 'love languages' are romantic actions and physical touch (with sex as an example).

Well, these are important questions to ponder. Which are your love languages? How do you describe and communicate love to your partner? Communicating your love is absolutely essential for a better sex life, so we're glad to share this article from sex coach Eric Amaranth on how and why for him, sexual acts outweigh romantic gestures. What are your thoughts? Don't forget to comment!

* * *

I was given a questionnaire by a reporter recently and one of the questions was a really good one, which I based the title of this blog post on. In my professional opinion, quality sexual acts outweigh romantic gestures.

Here are two stories explaining why:

When I was in my teens, sending love/adoration poems and flowers in creative ways was fun and the girls in my life did like those things. However, my sex life began and I had already taken on an intention to create sexual enjoyment for my girlfriend in a big way.

The wow factor and appreciation that she felt for me was ten-fold over what it was for my poems and flowers; which she did love, but not nearly as much as she did before she had big orgasms during hot sex. The enormity of those erotic sensations trumped FTD and Shelley-inspired writings.

Romantic gestures became the icing on the rich moist cake that was our sex life together. That said, she and I both let go of a great deal of our attachment and reliance on those gestures because the power of the sex was so much more profound and bonding. The women in my future would all echo to the affirmative.

The second anecdote I have is about eight years ago, a friend of mine in my teenage years contacted me out of the blue. He took issue with the fact that I had changed my perspective from poetry and flower-giving to an emphasis on being able to bring the sex skills home to the bedroom. I explained to him in a reply email my perspective.

Anyway, I have found per my present relationship that when the sex is great, that will sometimes inspire each other to produce more of those romantic gestures because of the appreciation they feel for each other.

That said, the gestures are not relied on. Adding a small heart-shaped box of quality chocolates to eat before and after said amazing sex is a bonus, but that’s the appetizer or dessert and not the main course. More romantic verbal compliments happen with a happy sex life, without a doubt.

Right now, more people are doing as I did years ago. They’re wondering if there is more to romance than these gestures: cards, jewelry, flowers, chocolates, dinners out. This is, by the way, part of the reason why I decided to become a sex life coach. To come back from my training and exploration to provide a faster path to those who want something even more powerful than the flowers and tennis bracelets. The most important thing is to move up to the level on the mountain where you can see the larger view of incorporating stellar sex in with your romantic gestures. Have both! Then see where your quality of life and love life will be.

Originally posted at Sex Life Coach NYC.

You have read this article better sex / Communication / confidence / Education / emotional / Eric Amaranth / for couples / marriage / monogamy / Sexuality with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/10/which-is-more-important-sex-or-romance.html. Thanks!

Why Have Spontaneous Sex

You may be thinking, "Seriously? I can't do that! I have children." Depending on your situation, you may need to plan slightly. But even then--the element of surprise in your sexual encounters makes a difference! Eric Amaranth is here to talk about why spontaneity in sex matters.

* * *

We generally think that sex almost always starts with an intense turn-on then spontaneous sex! As we've talked about, scheduling sex is a great way to have more of it. So you might think if it’s not spontaneous it’s not hot or worth spending time doing. When you’re single, it’s much easier to pull that off as we know. With children, extra demands on our time, more responsibilities, etc, the inspiration and time for spontaneous sex decreases naturally. Because couples are fixed on this sex form, as I call it, even less sex comes about. Thus, planning comes into it and the excitement of anticipation.

I tell my clients to take both of their options, in many cases, not just one. We know you can’t plan on spontaneity rising forth, no pun intended. You can’t wait for that. Do both. Plan hot sex dates and look forward to spontaneous moments.

Many find that as their sexual sophistication grows, they will plan a sex night, put it on the calendar and get started with it. Then, during that sex session, spontaneous, hot, new things often happen. As well, the couple returns to previous hot things done before that rise out of nowhere. That’s another important way to enjoy spontaneity in sex.

Here’s one way to create the turn-on of anticipation: your spouse sends you a hot email or text on what they can’t wait to do to your body tonight, for example. That’s attention! Fun, smoldering hot attention. Now you can’t wait for it either. Another point related to this is as you and your partner get better at giving each other sexual pleasure and big orgasms, your interest to have more sex, spontaneous or not, always increases.

It’s simple. If the cuisine is amazing, physical and/or mental issues aside, you want more. You don’t always have to be in the mood, the moment doesn’t have to be perfect, none of that. I’ve started having sex countless times when I’m not “horny,” but because of my skill set and often that of my partner’s I know it’s not going to be long at all before she and I are in a very different mood.

I understand the erotic of spontaneous sex as people know it. It’s great stuff! However, there are other paths to great sex. Never bottle yourself in too much, especially with regards to this issue. I never would have gained the understanding of sexual pleasure making and had the amount of sex that I’ve had and have if I left it all up to spontaneity.

Real life things do get embroiled. But as I’ve witnessed in my own life and the lives of my sex life coaching clients, everyone deal with those things together much better when they have a strong sexual connection. Their sex life together becomes an oasis and an encouragement for standing by each other. That’s that being in love thing. The trick is to stay in love beyond limerence. Reader, if you haven’t heard of limerence, look it up. It’s something everyone needs to know about.

Lastly, I know psychology studies have placed the time frame for the end of the honeymoon phase at within a year. Science has proven the seven year itch is now the three year itch. Science is an awesome tool. However, it has disadvantages. It is the proverbial microscope. It observes what’s happening in our present. It is not as good at giving an accurate picture of the “what if's."

I wonder, what if many more relationships had the high quality sex life? What if our culture experienced sex in a higher/ better form than we currently know it? Would those stats be different? I’m running the experiment, if you will, every time I work with a client. My results thus far are a resounding, yes.

Originally posted at Sex Life Coach NYC.

You have read this article advice / better sex / Communication / dates / dating / emotional / Eric Amaranth / for couples / marriage / stronger relationship with the title Eric Amaranth. You can bookmark this page URL https://jadejurgensen.blogspot.com/2012/10/why-have-spontaneous-sex.html. Thanks!

Fraulines Hot and Sexy